Dear Dr. Screwball: My coach said he wants me to deaden the ball when I bunt. What is he talking about?
Kelly H., Valencia, CA

This, I'm afraid, is a grave situation. Let's explore death as it pertains to baseball. A dead-pull hitter we all know about, a dead arm is a pitcher who is all worn out and a dead ball is one that is not in play because of a legally crated, temporary suspension of play. The dead-ball era was the first two decades of the 20th century when home runs were few and far between. That, of course, gave rise to the bunt, which brings us to your coach's order. Deadening the ball means to bunt it in such a manner that it slows quickly after it hits the ground and stops in a place where the pitcher or another infielder has a difficult play. This will most likely result in a hit, which will keep your rally ALIVE, proving once again that baseball is like the circle of life, just only shaped like a diamond.

Dear Dr. Screwball: What's the weirdest food choice you know of at a baseball park?
John R., Phoenix, AZ

Ooh, my stomach's already getting queasy! San Diego's Jack Murphy Stadium specializes in fish tacos. Brisket buffalo sandwiches are served at Denver's Coors Field. The Texas Astrodome offers foot-long jalapeno sausages on a stick. Dodger Stadium features fast-food Japanese and vegetarian pizza. How about those tofu hot dogs or 40-clove garlic chicken sandwiches at San Francisco 3Com Park? You'll find some Cuban cuisine at Tropicana Field in Florida. Anaheim Stadium has sushi, Yankee fans can buy knishes, and Boston's Fenway Park sells clam chowder!